Volume 8, Number
2(Summer 2003)
ssss Articles
sssssssBi
Bug to Lead Bi Definition Marchers
sssssssPridefest
2003
ssssss Bi
Definition 4th Annual Camping Trip
ssssss Illuminaughty
ssssss Bisexual
Paraphernalia
ssssss Stepping
toward the ‘b' in LGBT
ssssss Bisexuals
Are Invisible In An Either/Or World
ssssCalendar
ssssColumns
sssssssBi
The Editor
sssssssUpcoming
Discussion Topics
ssss
Disclaimer
Bi All Means! is a publication of Bi Definition, a bisexual social, support and activist organization in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. BAM is published quarterly and is offered to those on our mailing list on a subscription basis. To subscribe simply fill out this form.
Opinions expressed by writers in BAM are not necessarily those of the editors, publisher, advertisers nor the philosophy of Bi Definition. Any reference made to any individual or organization should not be construed as an indication of the same's orientation.
We reserve the right to edit any submission at our sole discretion.
Those who wish to contribute letters, articles, stories, poems or artwork
are encouraged to do so, and may have their names withheld if so desired.
Please provide text submissions typed double-spaced. Send all submissions
to: Bi All Means!/Bi Definition,
c/o Milwaukee LGBT Community Center, Suite 101, 315 W. Court St., Milwaukee,
WI 53212 ,
or e-mail bidef@hotmail.com
The unauthorized use of the ‘Bi Definition’ name is strictly
prohibited to members and nonmembers alike, except when written permission
is received from the current organizational leadership.
Vision Statement
Bi Definition shall provide a social, support and
activist organizational resource for bisexuals, people who do not like
labels and their allies residing in and visiting metropolitan Milwaukee,
WI. It shall work for equal rights and the liberation of all area bisexuals
and others who refuse strict heterosexual and/or homosexual personal identification.
Bi Definition will also collect and distribute information
on bisexuality.
Governance Statement
In order to insure that all minority opinions are
considered at business meetings, Bi Definition will use the consensus process
of decision making for governing.
Bi Bug to Lead Bi Definition Marchers
This year Bi Definition will march in the Pridefest Parade in front of the “Bi Bug,” a VW bug that we will decorate in Bi colors and slogans. We will also have a Bi Definition banner, at least one Bi flag and a bubble gun.
A new addition to this year’s march will be the preparation of handouts for the parade watchers. We will be taping candy hugs to our information line cards to hand out to spectators. The hugs will be taped with stickers that say “you have been hugged by a bisexual,” and maybe one or two other slogans.
We hope to have a large turnout for this year’s parade and are encouraging everyone to invite family and friends to join us as Bi Allies. There will be “Bi Ally” small signs for people to wear who want to join us and who don’t identify as bi. Also, the person who brings the most people to march with us will win a gift certificate for a one hour massage.
We will meet in front of the main gate at 1:30 for the parade line up. Look for the pink, purple and blue flag and the blue VW bug and join us.
Bi Definition 4th Annual Camping Trip Information
How Much: Camping—$5/night
Parking—$5/night or $20 for a year sticker
When: July 12-14 Friday-Sunday
Where: Kettle Moraine North, Greenbush Group Camp, Campsite #9
To Sign Up Call: Deb at 259-0203
Pridefest 2003—Making the ‘B’ Visible
Maybe we’re still years away from a bisexual band headlining at Pridefest, but Bi Definition is planning lots of fun opportunities to make bisexuals more visible at this year’s Pridefest.
On Saturday, June 7th from 1-4pm, Bi Definition will be gathering at one or two picnic tables by the lake closest to the Stonewall tent and children’s playground. This will be a chance for us to relax together while we also make Bi business cards, friendship bracelets and Bi stickers available to all.
Saturday evening we will meet at 7 p.m. at the booth that sells reusable drink mugs. Instead of our regular Saturday meeting and discussion, we will enjoy an evening together out at Pridefest. Bi Pride outfits are encouraged.
Sunday, June 8th at noon Bi Definition’s game show skit be performed at the Stonewall tent and at 2pm we will march in the Pride Parade with the Bi Bug. For details on these events, see the articles on page
Come help Bi Definition and bisexuals be seen at Pridefest 2003!
Stepping toward
the ‘b' in LGBT
By Stefanie J
IN Step, Milwaukee’s LGBT newspaper of record since 1984, has taken a step closer towards balanced reporting on Milwaukee’s queer community.
Bi Definition member and BAM! Editor Nikki Schlaishunt has jumped aboard
IN Step’s regular writing staff. Once a month, she will be submitting an
opinion piece
reflecting her thoughts and experiences as a bisexual. Two of her pieces
have already been published since April 2003.
IN Step can be found at businesses supporting Milwaukee’s free publications.
Illuminaughty: A Bi Game Show for the Stonewall Tent
For the past few years Bi Definition has given a presentation at the Stonewall tent at Pridefest. These have been well prepared and poorly attended. We decided that this year we needed something snappier than just another presentation and settled on the idea of doing a game show spoof with a bisexuality theme.
For the past month, Scott has worked diligently trying to contact the person who is organizing the Stonewall tent this year so that we could get a good spot. After numerous unanswered emails, he finally was contacted at the end of May. He was informed that almost all of the spots were already taken and only the least desirable times were left. This was very disappointing.
Nevertheless, when put to the group for a vote on whether or not we should persevere in spite of the awful time, everyone still wanted to go for it.
We will be presenting “Illuminaughty—A Bi Game Show for the New Millennium” on Sunday, June 8th at noon at the Stonewall tent. The game show will be spoofed on the Jeopardy format and will focus on bisexuality and bisexual community.
Here is a sneak preview. Test yourself and see if you can come
up with the questions to some of these answers:
Answer: 1983 the oldest bisexual women’s group begins.
Answer: ‘90’s dance song by La Rissa.
Answer: “I believe it will be the bisexuals that make the change
in the world.”
Answer: 4th annual weekend getaway for outdoor living and group
fun.
Come see the game show and find out the answers!
Bisexuals Are Invisible In An Either/Or World
We live in an either/or world. This means that we are trained to put things into one of two—and only two—categories and then rank these two things; e.g. men over women, straight over gay, mind over body, etc. This is called hierarchical dualism.
As a bisexual, poly, pagan woman, I have been involved in many different groups over the years. One thing I have noticed is that the more an ideal, a group or an issue challenges society’s norm of hierarchical dualism, the more that ideal, group or issue is undermined, attacked, and vilified. It doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with the idea itself or the people supporting the idea.
For example, forms of feminism that can fit into our hierarchical dualistic society thrive, while forms of feminism that advocate a basic restructuring of society have either been co-opted, disappeared or belittled to pointlessness. Forms of environmentalism that can fit into hierarchical dualism do well in this society—buying green products, using recycled paper, recycling cans and glass, all while still living basically the same over-consumtive lifestyle. Environmentalism that promotes a basic change in the way we live and the way we look at money—like the field of green economics—is blown off as silly, unrealistic and unworkable; all despite solid evidence to the contrary. (Never underestimate the power of denial!)
Bisexuals are perhaps the clearest example of the either/or paradigm (hierarchical dualism) clashing with the both/and paradigm. Bisexuals are widely maligned, belittled, rejected and vilified by both straight people and by the gay and lesbian community. We are told we have to “pick one side or the other.” Why this emphasis on having to pick a side?
Because, if we don’t pick a side, if we try to spread the message that there is room enough for all, to let people know that they can be accepted for the whole of who they are without picking a side, then there is the risk that we will put irreparable cracks in the infrastructure of hierarchical dualism, that perhaps the whole damn thing will come crashing down—and then what? The Unknown, Change, Something New—and therefore something to be frightened of.
The main tool of hierarchical dualism is fear. Fear keeps us all divided. Fear keeps us separated up into different small and manageable groups. The paradigm underlying hierarchical dualism is the idea that there is not enough to go around. In the financial field this is known as starvation economics. Fear is very effective at keeping us divided, separate, and alone, and this isolation combined with fear keeps the status quo.
A both/and world would be based on the idea that there are many different categories and, not only can’t you rank them, you wouldn’t want to rank them. Afterall, how can you say that blue is better than red or daffodils are better than tulips? This is what bisexuals do when they refuse to pick one gender preference and instead choose both, all or none. The both/and concept directly challenges the either/or paradigm.
Also a both/and world would be based on prosperity thinking—on believing that there is enough to go around so I don’t have to worry about getting less than my share or being shortchanged. If I am not making my decisions based on fear—the currency of the either/or world—then I can’t be controlled and, once again this is a direct challenge to the either/or paradigm.
In the past twenty years, bisexuals have made definite advances. We also have not made anywhere near the progress that lesbians and gays have. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, wondering how to approach the world in a way that will enable a dialogue to happen. I’ve been coming up with buttons and T-shirt slogans as a way of combating bisexual invisibility and I think I’ve found my favorite: “I’m bisexual. Feel free to ask questions.”
The really fearful will still shun me. But some people will ask me questions, and I can educate them, correct any misinformation and, best of all, I will give them the opportunity to meet a real-life bisexual who is human just like them. And perhaps they will begin to see the world as a little less black or white and a little more red and yellow and green and blue . . . .
On Saturday, March 15th Bi Definition members got together to create Bi Spirit wear. Tired of being invisible, we decided to make buttons, bandanas and friendship bracelets in Bi colors that members could wear to be out.
Among the items made were a T-shirt saying “Bi Definition Babe,” a button saying “I’m bisexual. Feel free to ask questions,” and bandanas tie-dyed pink, purple and blue.
We had a wonderful time coming up with slogans like “Why did the bisexual cross the road? What road?” We laughed and munched on snacks and had a great afternoon together.
We are encouraging everyone to wear Bi Spirit wear to Pridefest this year to let the larger community know that bisexuals are more than a faceless letter—we are real live human beings.
If you missed this event or if you’d like to add to what you already have, Outwards Bookstore has a nice selection of Bi paraphernalia, including coffee mugs, buttons and jewelry. Outwards Bookstore is located 2710 N. Murray. You can also buy the Pride pins there for $4 cash.
Bi Definition meets on the first Saturday and third Tuesday of every month at 7:00 P.M. for discussions about specific topics pertaining to bisexuality. All discusions are held at the Milwaukee LGBT Community Center, Suite 101, 315 W. Court St., Milwaukee, WI .
Instead of our regular Saturday meeting, join us at Pridefest on Saturday, June 7. Meet at the booth where they sell reusable drink mugs at 7pm and join us for an evening OUT! We encourage everyone to wear bi pride regalia.
On Tuesday, June 17 the topic will be "Bi 101: An Overview." We will gather definitions of bisexuality, go over bisexual myths and stereotypes and review bisexual history.
Have you ever run into someone that you instantly liked? Or met someone that you went all weak-kneed over? July’s topic will explore attraction, what it is and how we respond to it. Are you attracted to a specific type? What is the difference between being attracted to someone as a friend or to someone as a potential lover? Join us as we explore “What is Attraction?” in July on Sat. 5th and Tues.15th.
August’s topic is an old favorite: “Bi Relationships.” Our relationships, like our lives are always shifting, changing, growing, moving. How does being bisexual affect our relationships? Do we relate to the people in our lives differently based on our bisexuality? Do others relate to us differently when we tell them we are Bi? We will be exploring these and many other relationship questions in August on Sat. 2nd and Tues. 19th.
“How Being Bi Has Changed My Life” will be September’s topic in honor of International Celebrate Bisexuality Day which happens this month. When did you know you were bi and what has changed in your life since that discovery? Perhaps you had several points of discovery instead of just one—how did each of these affect you? What did you learn? Come share your stories, your ideas and your thoughts in September on Sat. 6th and Tues. 16th.
An annual Bi Definition membership includes discreet newsletter mailings and free admittance to all events. Cost of a single gathering for nonmembers is $5. For information on membership rates, call our information line (414) 299-9612. We also ask that you please refrain from wearing scented products at the meetings.
Summer is coming and Bi Definition is gearing up to challenge bisexual invisibility. Frustrated with being treated like the step-child, bisexual members are making plans and doing things to make Bi’s visible.
Already there have been Bi Bar Outings where we gather for social fun and we also wear our Bi buttons, shirts and colors. My monthly article in IN Step is my small way of challenging the gay and lesbian community to look at their prejudice and assumptions regarding Bi’s.
There’s more! Many members will be helping to make Bi Definition and bisexuality visible at this year’s Pridefest with a whole list of fun events. And the business meeting members are trying to organize Bi representation on the LGBT Community Center Board and, hopefully, on next year’s Pridefest Board.
Melissa Ethridge said, “I believe it will be the bisexuals that make the change in the world.” I think she is right—bisexuality challenges the black and white divisions that keep us all separate and isolated.
The summer looms large with so many possibilities!
Respectfully Submitted,
Nikki Schlaishunt
For information or confirmation on any Bi Definition event listed,
contact Nikki at (414)299-9612
or write: Bi All Means!/Bi Definition
c/o Milwaukee LGBT Community Center, Suite 101, 315 W. Court St., Milwaukee,
WI 53212 .
Bi Definition socials/discussions are held on the first Saturday
and third Tuesday of each month @ 7:00 p.m.
at the Milwaukee LGBT Community Center, Suite 101, 315 W. Court
St., Milwaukee, WI 53212 .
June
Sat. 7 Group 'Outing' at PrideFest, Meet at the booth
where they sell reusable drink mugs at 7pm and join us for an evening OUT!
Tues. 17 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic: "Bi
101: An Overview" LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
July
Sat. 5 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic: “What
is Attraction?” LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
Tues. 15 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic:“What
is Attraction?” LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
August
Sat. 2 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic: “Bi
Relationships.” LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
Tues. 19 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic: “Bi
Relationships.” LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
September
Sat. 6 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic: “How
Being Bi Has Changed My Life” LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
Tues. 16 @ 7 P.M. Bi Definition Social/Discussion. Topic: “How
Being Bi Has Changed My Life” LGBT Community Center, 315 W. Court St.
