My PADD or Yours?
Written by Ghostwriter
Characters: Janeway, Chakotay
November 1997

DISCLAIMER: Paramount owns the Voyager Characters - I just borrowed them and loosened their turtlenecks a bit. No copyright infringement is intended.

Author's Note: This story was my very first piece of fan fiction! Written so long ago...

~ * ~ * ~

A loud warning beep sounded from the data PADD Captain Janeway was studying. Chakotay looked up from his seat across the desk from her, eyebrows raised out of curiosity.

"Sounds like this is your lucky day," he said, trying to look serious. Though her face never moved, her eyes rolled up past the top of the PADD to look at him. There was a warning written in them. He met her gaze evenly, waiting. The beep sounded again. Chakotay shifted slightly in his seat. "Aren't you going to look?" She closed her eyes in resignation, taking a deep breath.

"Are you going to tell everyone if I choose not to acknowledge it?" she asked.

"Probably," he replied, a hint of a smile forming at the corners of his mouth. She shook her head slowly, eyes still closed. "Until now, you've inexplicably managed to avoid coming across one, Kathryn. The rest of us were beginning to wonder," he finished. She opened her eyes again, and, after a slight hesitation, pressed a button on the PADD. Chakotay watched her expression carefully as she read the message she had just brought up on the tiny screen.

"You've got to be kidding me," she objected softly after a few moments.

"Something interesting?" he asked, holding his hand out. She looked back up at him, then at his outstretched arm. "All PADD messages must be confirmed by a senior officer," he recited.

Janeway glared at him. "I am a senior officer," she replied coolly.

"In our case, another senior officer," he continued, keeping his hand extended.

"This is ridiculous," she began, handing the PADD to him, "I can't do that." He took the PADD from her and read the message. This time, he couldn't help the smile that crept across his face. Resisting the urge to laugh out loud, he looked back at her. She was still glaring.

"You're the one that started this," he stated quietly, handing it back to her. She let the PADD drop onto her desk, all thoughts of the Astrometrics report she'd been reading completely gone.

"I made it quite clear that I would tolerate these little...challenges...as long as the execution of such didn't go against Starfleet protocol or interfere with the proper function of this ship. I think this one pretty much fits under both categories," she finished, pointing at the PADD.

"A little harder to swallow when you're on the receiving end, isn't it?" he smiled.

She was not amused. "Commander."

"You basically ordered Tuvok to comply with his message, even though it meant making a complete fool of himself," Chakotay responded.

"He's a Vulcan. He's incapable of feeling like a fool," she shot back. "Besides, I suggested that he follow through with it, I didn't order him."

"It must have been a pretty strong suggestion. Even I can't see the logic of a Vulcan singing a vulgar Bajoran love song to the Doctor with the ship-wide comlink open for every one to hear."

The captain started laughing at the memory, despite herself. The Doctor's comments following Tuvok's serenade had been just as hysterical as the entire incident itself. Chakotay took a deep breath, grateful that he'd broken the tension a bit. "I must admit I wasn't aware of what Tuvok was being asked to do when I suggested he go through with it," she said, still chuckling. "I just told him that it was all in good fun, and that his participation would only help increase crew morale."

"I think the ovation he received over the comlink confirmed that," Chakotay smiled. She looked back up at him. Her eyes were still smiling, but her face had gone serious again.

"If I followed through with this, Chakotay, it would be a very serious breech of protocol, not to mention the most embarrassing performance to date," she stressed.

"Momentary breech of protocol," he offered, challenging her with his eyes.

"You can't be serious," she began.

"Why not? Yes, it probably wouldn't sit well with a panel of Fleet Admirals, who, by the way, are about 60,000 light years away, and I'll admit it would be enough to turn even my face red, but it is all in good fun," he said, repeating her words.

She just stared at him. "Couldn't I just change the message a bit..."

"That would be against PADD protocol, Kathryn," Chakotay grinned. He had her. "Either you go through with it, or you chicken out and live with the disappointment you caused your fellow shipmates, none of whom have turned down their own challenges."

"You know," she began, "When I started this PADD business a few months ago, I had no idea it would mutate into something this outrageous." He almost laughed at her choice of words. Mutate was definitely a good way to describe the progression.

Indeed, it had started out innocently enough. A crew desperately in need of a morale booster, commanded by a very worried captain. Neelix's attempts to improve the oppressive mood on board had failed miserably, so the captain decided to take matters into her own hands... subtly, of course. She'd programmed some of the PADDs on board to signal an encoded message to the user when a specific part of the PADD's memory had been accessed. The messages ranged from 'Take an extra thirty minutes for lunch today,' to a much sought after 'Two hours of uninterrupted holodeck time,' and 'Twelve extra hours of shore leave at the next available opportunity.'

Her initiative worked, and soon her officers were working harder than ever with happy expressions on their faces as they anticipated finding the next message. She had made the announcement that all messages had to be confirmed by a senior officer so that arrangements could be made to shift duty schedules around accordingly. Crew morale was rising, and everything was looking up. Then, someone decided to get creative with the programming...

Pretty soon, messages of questionable origin began popping up. After that, strange things started happening, though nothing that ever endangered the ship or any of the crew. One crewman reported to work wearing his uniform inside-out, another dyed her hair three different neon colors. The captain had been approached seven times by different crewmen who told her - always within earshot of others - that she looked devastatingly beautiful that day, and for the last hour of the Alpha shift on stardate 5827.3, the computer mysteriously began singing all verbal replies. She had a pretty good idea which senior officer had confirmed and approved some of the more ridiculous messages, but she doubted that Tom Paris was behind all of the programming. This was definitely a collective effort.

She had then made another announcement, making it clear that any messages challenging ship protocols or interfering with ship's function would be investigated thoroughly. She didn't, however, order that the messages stop all together. The last thing she wanted was for practical jokes to start running rampant around the ship, but so far the incidents had been nothing but harmless fun. And it was doing wonders for morale.

"So, what's it going to be?" Chakotay's question snapped her back to reality.

"It's going too far," Janeway grumbled, trying desperately to think of a way out. "I'm the Captain. I'm supposed to set an example for the rest of the crew!"

"You're too embarrassed."

"That's one way of looking at it," she scowled at him.

"I don't think you have anything to be embarrassed about," he started, his eyes twinkling. "None of the junior officers would dare razz you about it, and if anyone asks I would deny the incident entirely. All you have to do is pretend that nothing is wrong, and then, afterward, like nothing unusual happened."

"You make it sound so easy. Why don't you do it?"

"The message was on your PADD," he answered, smiling broadly.

"Damn," she whispered, turning to stare out the window at the other end of the room. "I can't believe I'm considering this."

"The same rules apply to you, Kathryn. You've got exactly twenty-four hours to meet the challenge, and believe me, if you don't I'll know about it," he said, getting up from his seat.

"And if I do, the entire ship will know about it," she responded, sounding quite irritated.

"That's the whole point, isn't it?" He was enjoying himself immensely. The captain was squirming uncomfortably in her chair. She shot him another icy glare as he turned, still smiling, and headed for the Bridge.

~ * ~ * ~

The captain remained in her Ready Room most of the day, reviewing reports and consulting with several officers privately regarding ship's operations. No one seemed to notice the perpetual grin that was stuck on the first officer's face as he sat in his chair. He was beginning to wonder if she would really go through with it. If she asked, he would certainly pretend that he never saw the message, letting it go unchallenged without a word to anyone. But, she hadn't asked this of him...yet.

Roughly thirty minutes after Tuvok had met with the captain concerning security matters, the doors to her Ready Room slid open. No one looked up immediately, knowing that it was her entering. Suddenly, and awkward silence penetrated the Bridge.

"Status report, Mr. Tuvok," she snapped.

Paris, noting the hesitation before the Vulcan spoke, turned to look behind him. The captain stood on the step directly below the Tactical station wearing nothing but her undergarments, which, the pilot couldn't help but notice were definitely not standard regulation. The lace trim on the black bra was especially becoming on her. She stood, hands on her hips, waiting for her security officer to respond. The Vulcan's eyebrows were raised so high it looked like they might disappear into his hairline, but after a moment, he recovered sufficiently to speak.

"All systems are functioning normally, Captain," he replied.

"Good," she said, turning to walk further onto the Bridge. He realized she was barefoot as well. "Mr. Kim, can I expect an Operations report before the end of the day?" Paris tore his gaze away from the captain's scarcely clad form long enough to take a look around at the rest of the Bridge officers. Harry Kim was bright red, his eyes bulging from their sockets, and the commander just looked at her with a very calm appreciative expression. "Mr. Kim, do I have your attention?" she repeated. She didn’t even seem phased by what she was doing. No blushing, no trying to cover herself up, just business as usual.

"Yes, Ca'am, I mean Maptain, uh, sir, no, ma'am...Captain," he stuttered, blushing even more furiously. She arched a disapproving eyebrow at the young officer, then turned slightly to look at Chakotay.

"I think Mr. Kim could use an extra break, Commander. It sounds like he's been working too hard," she said evenly.

"Yes, Captain," he replied, clearing his throat afterward. She turned around to face the helm, her eyes meeting the pilot's for the first time. He stopped breathing as she stepped down toward him, her trim body highlighted by the glow of the nebula pictured on the view screen.

"Any problems getting around the nebula, Mr. Paris?" His eyes met hers steadily.

"No, ma'am," he said softly, his voice a bit strangled. She rested a hand dutifully on his shoulder as she looked at the view screen.

"I should have the new navigational charts plotted and ready to be laid in within the hour," she stated, nodding crisply at him before she turned and headed across the Bridge. "I'll be in my Ready Room, Commander," she called back right before the doors slid open and she disappeared within. The stunned silence remained like a shroud covering the Bridge. Paris finally ventured a thought.

"Well," he commented, not a hint of sarcasm in his voice, "There's something you don't see every day."

"Indeed," replied Tuvok, his consternation apparent. "Perhaps the captain requires some extra time off as well."

"Noted, gentlemen," Chakotay piped in, "Everyone back to work." The officers complied, though it took a long time for Kim's face to return to its normal color.

An hour later, the captain reemerged from her Ready Room, fully clothed in her uniform, and acting like nothing out of the ordinary had taken place. Tuvok's eyebrows never came down from his hairline, though he didn't say a word, and poor Ensign Kim was having a terrible time trying to remain calm and focused. Paris stared at his console, hiding the smirk that was plastered on his face. Chakotay stole a glance at his captain. All he saw was her command face, professional to the last.

Janeway turned her head slightly, catching Chakotay's gaze. Her expression was unreadable, but the sparkle in her eyes told him she was definitely smiling on the inside. She knows, he thought to himself. I thought I encrypted my access code.

"The new navigational charts, Commander," she stated, handing him a PADD. He swallowed hard, staring at her. Her eyebrow arched almost imperceptibly, her eyes never moving from his.

"Aye, Captain," he responded, trying hard to keep his voice even. He slowly took the PADD from her, and then settled it on his leg, hoping she would just turn away and not press the issue. No such luck.

"The charts should be programmed in as soon as possible," she emphasized. He nodded, without looking at her, and got up from his chair. He suddenly realized he was sweating, and silently wished he could be somewhere else at that moment - anywhere else! He walked over to one of the consoles on the top level and, with a deep breath, began downloading information from the PADD into Voyager's systems.

Fifteen minutes later, he was almost through with his task. Thinking perhaps he had jumped to conclusions before, he allowed his mind to wander back to the image of the captain striding out of her Ready Room, 'dressed down.' He chuckled softly to himself. It had been worth the risk.

His thoughts were interrupted by a loud warning beep emanating from the PADD he held. Every head on the Bridge turned toward the commander. He felt the weight of their stares on his back. Closing his eyes, he could almost hear her silent laughter.

Damn....

~ * ~ finis ~ * ~

Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated! email Ghostie